Love & Relationship

Lasting relationships require unconditional love

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Who doesn’t want a lasting relationship filled with love, joy and care? Many people find it difficult to build a healthy relationship because they expect their relationships to be as “perfect” as they are often portrayed on movies, TV shows and social media.

Before I share my thoughts on how to set the foundation for a healthy relationship, let me start by stating a root cause that creates conflicts in a relationship. When you expect your partner to match that image of perfection you have created in your head, you will get disappointed every time your partner fails to meet those imaginary check marks.

 The very first step for building a lasting relationship is to make sure your subjective expectations do not make your partner feel imprisoned. Great relationships take time, patience and a lot of understanding from each other. If you intentionally or unintentionally try to change your partner so that he or she can perfectly fit inside your imaginary list of check marks, perhaps you are not ready to be in a real relationship.

 You must understand that your expectations and your thoughts are a result of your own individual journey of life. Starting from the very first thing you can remember as a child to the moment you are reading this very sentence, your mind is a sum of everything you have experienced, seen, felt, heard, smelled, touched or been told by your parents, teachers, government or media.

You must realize that your partner has not gone through the same things as you have in life. There will always be a gap between your own and your partner’s subjective experiences and expectations from life and relationship. It’s this very gap that will allow you to explore the depth of your relationship. It will help you both grow as individuals as well as a couple. If you are lucky enough to have a partner that clearly sees this simple truth, your relationship will not need any words, or labels to express your love for each other.

Give your partner the freedom to exist as a unique individual and not simply as an extension of yourself.

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